My Journey through Singlehood 1

my journey of singlehood

As I sat up to pray this evening, I am filled with much joy; the joy is indescribable. God has done for me what no man can do, He is ever faithful and never disappoints anyone who trusts in Him. It’s my wedding eve, I’ll be walking down the aisle with the love of my life tomorrow being 17th November 2018. Who could have thought this will be possible? God has blessed me with a man after his heart😇. Although my singlehood journey hasn’t been an easy ride; I had made mistakes and experienced delays, but God in His infinite mercies have given me a gift beyond what words can explain.

As I write this story for you dearest reader to learn from my experience, permit me to briefly introduce myself. My name is Hannah Martins and I’ll be 33 by my next birthday (i.e. next month). I’ll be getting married tomorrow to George Andrews. I’m a Christian by God’s grace and constantly growing in God’s love. Please permit me to walk you through my story of desperation, disappointments and unbelief. it’s sure going to be a good read🤗.

As a young teenager, I had always dreamt of getting married before the age of 24. I never imagined that I would be getting married at the age of 32. I graduated from high school at age 15 and immediately got admission to study sociology at the University of Port Harcourt, Nigeria. At age 21, I was done with the National Youth Service Corps program and retained as a lecturer in the University where I schooled. Everything was going as planned and desired.

I met Christ in my second year at the University after reading a Christian magazine I got from a friend; Oh, it was such a wonderful experience. I saw how wretched a sinner I was and how Jesus is ready to save me from such wretchedness. I continued in my Christian faith and was determined that nothing will stop my relationship with Jesus.

I was a very comfortable Bachelorette at the age of 23. I was lecturing, ran a textile business and had my personal car (hey you, don’t get jealous, it’s the Lord’s doing😉). But one thing was missing which my heart yearned for – A man to call mine. I prayed earnestly, and somewhere along the line I began to feel that God was delaying in granting my requests of a life partner. I felt so lonely as I looked around me and noticed every single lady at my place of work had a man to hook up with. I know I am a very beautiful lady, there is no doubt about it. I deserve to have godly men on the queue trying to get my attention, but that wasn’t the case. I was very desperate that I decided to help myself out by finding a man, Afterall heaven helps those who help themselves (so says the popular axiom.

Few weeks after my 24th birthday, I met a young man at a business seminar, his name is Charles. He was my dream guy; he ran his personal business, partners with a non-governmental organization, owns a car and a house. Besides these, he was so handsome and light-skinned (I almost fainted in admiration the first day I met him☺️). He also garnished the aforementioned qualities with being “God-fearing” (so it seemed). We exchanged contacts and got talking; then I fell in love.


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When Charles asked me out for a relationship, I didn’t hesitate to give him a positive reply because I didn’t feel any restraint when I prayed. While praying about Charles, I do ask God to perfect my desire to get married to him. I didn’t ask for guidance, it was deliberate because Charles has all the qualities I desired in a man and I supposed that our meeting wasn’t a coincidence (didn’t the bible say the path of the just is ordered by the Lord😉).

My friend, Abigail (God bless her soul) tried to query my decisions. She wasn’t comfortable with my relationship with Charles. She once told me that Charles doesn’t look like a genuine Christian to her. I became angry with Abigail and decided to keep her a distance . I thought she was jealous of me, but I didn’t know that she saw all I couldn’t see due to my blindness caused by lust and idolatry (I idolized Charles in my heart). I thought she was filled with envy because I was always ahead of her in nearly every aspect of life (academics, career, finance). I cut ties with her and lost our friendship of five years, though she tried to get back my attention, but I never gave her a chance.

With Charles, I felt confident and happy; but a terrible thing happened to me, I lost my faith in God😔. This happened gradually without me realising it. Charles made me believe that I was taking spiritual matters too seriously than God expects of us as humans. He made me see that I am not enjoying life the way I should have because of my so-called belief. He made me see that God is not a strict God that will limit my freedom with so much rules and regulations. He explained to me that the things I thought mattered do not matter in Christendom. He made me see that I am archaic in my Christian beliefs and standards. He convinced me into changing my local church and all godly associations. Little by little, I found myself going back to the things I once left behind. I tried to find the bridges I once burned. I went back to swallowing my vomit.

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PS: Names, Character and Events used in this story are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons or events is completely coincidental.

Story by Christiana Oghogho Okafor

Photo by Anna Shvets from Pexels

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7 thoughts on “My Journey through Singlehood 1”

  1. This is a very interesting read. Many young women fell prey to this trap and type of guy because they are tired of waiting. I pray that this will be a wake up call for a young girl that reads this post and may be in the same situation.

  2. Wow you are great story teller! I read every word. It is so interesting how we can lust for someone in our heart and convenience ourselves that they are perfect in every way especially when others try to tell us otherwise. Love and the heart are a very powerful thing in the human experience. Once we love, there is nothing anyone can say that will sway us one way or the other. Thanks for the read xxx

  3. So inspiring to hear, and is a story we all need sometimes to remind us that we’re not the only ones going through singlehood! Thanks so much for sharing.

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